Become a Follower of the Big Dude!

Meet the divine Dude in this blog. This Dude has had and seen his share of sacred shit. He's not afraid of it or of its language. I can't relate to a god that's been crucified, but I can relate to one whom my government has imprisoned and humiliated. I can relate to one who's been raped by his own holy men. I can relate to one who grew up playing baseball or soccer and who dated the Prom Queen. I can relate to the god who knows the working of corporate conglomerates, pimps, and teen-age girls who are pregnant. I can relate to the god who loves alcoholics and drug addicts just a tad more than wall street hotshots or so-called holy men who abuse little boys. This Dude thinks all of us are mortal particles in an ocean of sacred shit. This Dude recycles.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

If I Give My Will To You, Will You Handle It With Care . . .

Almost every spiritual practice seems to ask that you surrender your human will or perhaps ego to some higher being or another.  I seem incapable of doing that.

Oh, I say the words.  I pray and meditate.  I recognize that I can't "fix" my life by myself.  I try to "let go and let God" as the saying goes.

Alas, I'm clueless how this would look, what I would do, or what I would feel.  I got nothing!  I can be devastated, overwhelmed, terrified and yada yada, but the best I can do at those moments is say:  "Help!"  That doesn't feel like surrender.  It feels like I've been taken hostage by life.  I'd like to be more willing to trust some universal good.  I want to do this; I don't know how.

I sometimes have fun with it, playing my guitar and singing the old song: "If I give my heart to you" only substituting the word "will" for heart.  So, I can read about it, pray about it, joke about it, sing about it, but I can't really do it.

Yes, I'm working the 12-Steps and I have no problem admitting I'm powerless over lots of things and people.  I've got the first step down cold.  Then, we get to the second step where you recognize that maybe there's a higher being that could restore some clarity.  I get that.  At the third step which is actually turning your will over to this alleged being, I'm stumped.  Did anyone once feel stuck like this and then find ways to let go?

A friend of mine said that he started out by letting go of little things like having to control the family remote!  Another friend said he gives his will to God when he gets up in the morning and spends the rest of the day trying to get it back.  So, I know it's not the easiest thing for many, many of us.  Please post your ideas in the comments section for the benefit of all those, like me, who can go through the motions but secretly know it's not for real.  Roxie


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