I've been away almost a year. Perhaps I had cancer and was fighting for my life? Perhaps I had no computer? Perhaps I . . . no excuse. I lost faith for awhile and was wandering in the dark. It happens. If we're honest, it happens a lot. If our "faith" is not just intellectual, but permeates all corners of our being, it happens really a lot.
Intellectually, I can't reason my way into any kind of faith. My heart and spirit and gut apprehend it in some strange way. The only way I can really explain my lapse is this: I was looking down afraid of the next step. Instead of looking up to find the way, I was focused on staying erect, on not falling, on putting one foot tentatively in front of the other.
That, too, is the journey. That's where I've been. Sometime is IS faith to take one step at a time. Sometimes that's all the faith we can muster. Listen to my words. We don't "muster" faith or, I should say, our spiritual nature. It's in and around us. We can ignore it. We can refuse to trust it. We can be hurt so much by life that we can't conceive of a God who would treat us that way. All of that.
In the end, faith is really mysterious. It's a choice but we don't make it alone. There are forces in an around us, guiding us. Sometimes we are aware; sometimes we are not aware. They are there whether we believe it or not. Our beliefs do not shape the universe.
There. That's when I have faith. When I get out of my poor ego self and recognize that I'm just a particle, not the wave. I have to trust the ocean which I can never fully know or understand from the droplet's perspective. My beliefs do not shape the Universe. Roxie
Intellectually, I can't reason my way into any kind of faith. My heart and spirit and gut apprehend it in some strange way. The only way I can really explain my lapse is this: I was looking down afraid of the next step. Instead of looking up to find the way, I was focused on staying erect, on not falling, on putting one foot tentatively in front of the other.
That, too, is the journey. That's where I've been. Sometime is IS faith to take one step at a time. Sometimes that's all the faith we can muster. Listen to my words. We don't "muster" faith or, I should say, our spiritual nature. It's in and around us. We can ignore it. We can refuse to trust it. We can be hurt so much by life that we can't conceive of a God who would treat us that way. All of that.
In the end, faith is really mysterious. It's a choice but we don't make it alone. There are forces in an around us, guiding us. Sometimes we are aware; sometimes we are not aware. They are there whether we believe it or not. Our beliefs do not shape the universe.
There. That's when I have faith. When I get out of my poor ego self and recognize that I'm just a particle, not the wave. I have to trust the ocean which I can never fully know or understand from the droplet's perspective. My beliefs do not shape the Universe. Roxie
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